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Procrastination is Self Hatred?



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This was inspired by Robin Sharma's book 'The 5AM Club,' which you can find here https://amzn.to/2FReIFf 

Besides the main topic I also discuss:
-The importance of taking breaks
-How will power is strongest in the morning and weakest at night, the last few hours before going to bed.


Is Procrastination Self Hatred?

We all procrastinate.   

It primarily affects me when it comes to my creative efforts.     

I have so much to offer, but I procrastinate because I don´t feel as if I´m not getting recognized for putting in the work.     I know better than that, but it feels good to say.   Why is recognition important to me?    Is it my ego?    Was I told once ‘you’re great!’     Do I now expect it all the time?  

Is producing content worthwhile if one is making a living from it?    At that point isn’t creativity being forced?   Regular creation is fun, but who wants to be pressured to produce what sells?     This is not a bad thing just my preference.

My content doesn´t get many views/listens.    I ask myself what is success, what number is good enough?   Who am I comparing myself to?     ´Comparison is the thief of joy´ is a quote that comes to mind.

What happened to doing something because you love it?    I love creating, and 
I´m not looking for likes, views, listens, but in some aspect, I am.    It motivates me to continue.  Looking back at my body of work that I’ve been building for the last 3-5 years is another motivator.

What´s the difference between this podcast/blog/video being a creative scratch to itch or a lifelong endeavor?    Why am I doing any of this?   I’m making this digital photo album of my life so that I can look back on it later and see all the cool stuff I’ve done.    The bonus would be encouraging others to do the same.

When I release audio content I´d like to make short videos of it all, but I again procrastinate because it may take too long to produce, then I won´t be able to publish another weekly podcast.   Guilt arises, then I feel I’m not living up to my  potential.  

This is all born from advice I’ve received from multiple(virtual)mentors.

Some of it being:

-Produce weekly, same date and time, become part of someone’s routine.    
-Give your content away for free, don’t expect anything in return and you won’t be dissapointed.    
-It takes up to 10 plus years to be recognized if ever. 
-Stop listening to everybody and do the work

I run into conflict here.      What should I do?    Blindly go with this advice because it resonates with me or  ask does this really work for me?     Am I open to change?     This has led me down a path of indecision, anxiety and frustration multiple times.

The first step to stop this form of self hatred; remove the pressure of publishing on a schedule.   Take a break when needed, especially if you are cooking up new content which is often the case.   Podcasters I regularly listen to have taken months off.   

On a recent episode of the Video Creators YouTube channel, I heard Tim Schmoyer say how 1 view is an actual person who sat and consumed your content.     When I look at it like that, 5-10-20 views is a lot of people looking at my material.    If I’m in a room with 10-20 people giving me their full attention for however many minutes, that’s incredible in itself.

Sometimes I’m so in the weeds and don’t see the bigger picture.    A great exercise is to write down all the activity you’ve done in the day for a period of time(3 days, 1 week). There one can see exactly how much time was put into producing content.    When you come to find out, you’ll see you haven’t been procrastinating at all but laying down the next brick to the house you’re building.      ‘Done is better than perfect.’


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